Planet Robby

Robby Gordon Headquarters: Dakar, Desert & Domes

#7 Mapei Speed Energy Dodge Daytona 500
Pre Race Report

• Team Gordon in the Show! – Robby Gordon Motorsports launched its 2012 Nascar season in fine form on Thursday as the #7 Mapei Speed Energy Dodge raced its way into the Daytona 500. After some initial issues with hot engine oil temps, Gordon and crew recovered nicely and took advantage of several cautions to finish in the second transfer spot.

• You say Penske, I say Arrington… – Never one to take a knife to a gun fight, Gordon’s team is working hard on a deal to put Penske power into the 7 car for Sunday’s Great American Race. According to Nascar sources, Gordon will be allowed to use one of Penkse’s back-up engines, provided Rob arrange a private meeting for Nascar chief Brian France with new-comer Danica Patrick. France is a said to be a big fan of the 29 year-old driver and would like nothing more than to inspect her under carriage and tail pipe.

• A Sad Day for Michael Waltrip – In what can only be described as a “senior moment”, part-time driver and full-time team owner Michael Waltrip crashed his Aaron’s dream machine while leaving pit road during the first Duel race on Thursday. Waltrip inexplicably made a right-handed turn and hit the wall coming out of turn 2. When asked why he turned right on a track with nothing but left turns, Waltrip feebly responded that he lost his concentration while day dreaming of his ex wife Buffy. When asked to comment on her ex husband’s answer, Buffy speculated the real reason for the incident was Waltrip’s in-car self-love activities.

Robby Gordon quotes: “I’m very proud of the guys working their butts off to get the car ready for the Duel race and I couldn’t be happier to race our way into the 500. Sleeping is over rated, so I’ll continue to pound down Speed Energy drinks between now and Sunday. By the way, the Dakar tech guys can continue to kiss my ass.”

Miles Stanley quotes: “I couldn’t agree more.”

Editor’s Note: I’m glad to once again offer my usual satirical missives for your reading enjoyment.

Tags: pre, race, report

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@Slider, thanks for the 'clean' version.nice

I'm with Brian France I'd love to inspect Danica's undercarriage and her front headlights aint to bad either lol 

Thanks, Slider. I missed most of this during the week. I appreciate the opportunity to catch up.

Well done sir, but I am still pretty sure MW doesn't dream about ANY women...if you catch my drift...I mean draft...

Ah Sli, I have missed you and your "reportsw."

Your back!!
Best chuckles come from a Slide - Way perspictive

Slider is back!

Welcome back Slider!

It's been a long time between reports. Welcome back and don't stay away so long.

Great stuff Slider!

Did POS & Buffy really break up?!

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